Cancer Land

Cancer land är en väldigt ensam plats att resa till. Inget jag rekommenderar. Jag saknar så att få skratta ordentligt, att få vara vanlig och att leva som vanligt.Jag saknar också att få prata med systrar med cancer. Måste ta tag i det idag, att kontakta medresenärer, någon att diskutera cellgifter,mastektomi, lymfödem- någon att skratta åt eländet med ;) Herregud, jag måste skratta ordentligt snart, får ta tag i det också.
Just nu läser jag Lance Armstrongs bok "It's Not About the Bike-My Journey Back to Life". Det skulle lika gärna kunnat vara mina ord (tja, inte biten om professionell cykling då...=) Han beskriver cellgiftshelvetet så här: "...The sickness was in the details, in the nasty aside of the treatment. Cancer was a vague sense of unwellness, but chemo was an endless series of specific horrors, until I began to think the cure was as bad as, or worse than, the disease...But chemo felt like a kind of living death." Tja, det är ju bara att ta sig igenom. Prinsessan Lea är skadad och väldigt mörbultad, och just därför väljer jag att tro att hon fullföljde sitt krig till min fulla belåtenhet där inne i kroppen. Några dagar till av isolering sedan börjar vandringen mot återhämtning.*******
Cancer Land is a very lonely place to be. Nothing I recommend. I miss to laugh out loud, to be ordinary and have the energy to do ordinary things. I miss talking to cancer sisters. Have to do something about that today-need to discuss chemo, mastektomi, lymphedema and laugh at the misery together with equals. Help, I need to really laugh before I go crazy, need to do something about that too.
At the moment I am reading Lance Armstrong's book "It's Not About the Bike-My Journey Back to Life". It could have been my words (well, not the part about professional biking...=) He describes the chemo hell as follows: "...The sickness was in the details, in the nasty aside of the treatment. Cancer was a vague sense of unwellness, but chemo was an endless series of specific horrors, until I began to think the cure was as bad as, or worse than, the disease...But chemo felt like a kind of living death." Well, it is just to get through it. Princess Lea is injured and very achy, and just because of that I choose to believe that her battle inside my body was extremely successful. A few more days of isolation and then I begin to climb the stairs towards recovery.